"Being a woman is of special interest only to aspiring male transsexuals. To actual women, it is simply a good excuse not to play football."
-Fran Lebowitz
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"As a teenager you are at the last stage in your life when you will be happy to hear that the phone is for you."
-Fran Lebowitz
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"Success didn't spoil me, I've always been insufferable."
-Fran Lebowitz
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"Romantic love is mental illness. But it's a pleasurable one. It's a drug. It distorts reality, and that's the point of it. It would be impossible to fall in love with someone that you really saw."
-Fran Lebowitz
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"If you are a dog and your owner suggests that you wear a sweater suggest that he wear a tail."
-Fran Lebowitz
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"There is no such thing as inner peace. There is only nervousness or death. Any attempt to prove otherwise constitutes unacceptable behavior."
-Fran Lebowitz
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Same Category
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"If cooking becomes an art form rather than a means of providing a reasonable diet, then something is clearly wrong."
-Tom Jaine
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"My soul is dark with stormy riot: directly traced over to diet."
-Samuel Hoffenstein
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"This cream will help one's nature strengthen and grow, The diet gives support in my decline."
-Du Fu
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"The 17 Day Diet' keeps your body and metabolism guessing. I call this 'body confusion.'"
-Mike Moreno
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"Hope is a very thin diet."
-Thomas Shadwell
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"I dream about 'Cheers.' Like when you go on a diet and you dream of pizza. I always think of those wonderful years. I loved working on it."
-George Wendt
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