"Also, I used to think that one day I might get someone to iron my shirts, but the truth is I really like doing them myself."
-David Sedaris
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"I tend to show everything I do to my family, to check they won't be offended.“
-David Sedaris
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"But most good movies have a gun in them."
-David Sedaris
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"I go to the movies at least five times a week, and after a while everything becomes a blur to me."
-David Sedaris
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"I've been keeping a diary for thirty-three years and write in it every morning. Most of it's just whining, but every so often there'll be something I can use later: a joke, a description, a quote. It's an invaluable aid when it comes to winning arguments. 'That's not what you said on February 3, 1996,' I'll say to someone."
-David Sedaris
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"When I look at a lot of older stuff that I've written, I think one sign of amateur humor writing is when you see people trying too hard."
-David Sedaris
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"The humor section is the last place an author wants to be. They put your stuff next to collections of Cathy cartoons."
-David Sedaris
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"While Free Choice Vouchers didn't fulfill my vision of a health care system in which every American would be empowered to hire and fire their insurance company, they were a foothold for choice and competition and a safety valve for Americans whose employers are already forcing them to bear more and more of their family's health insurance costs."
-Ron Wyden
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"The importance of human life should be universally respected - and that refers to children before they are born and after. All children have the right to be brought up in a loving two-parent family where the notion of divorce is not even possible."
-Christopher Monckton
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"More than any other setting - more than battlefields or boardrooms or a spaceship headed for intergalactic travel - I'll put my money on the family to provide an endless source of comedy, tragedy and intrigue."
-Joyce Maynard
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"But I am Armenian and I understand what it is to lose a country and lose a family and have massacres and genocides and everything against my people."
-Andrea Martin
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"I've always known I wanted a family."
-Charlize Theron
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"And whereas women had to fight to find their way into the workforce, men are now fighting to reclaim their place in the family structure."
-Bob Geldof
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