"In order to maintain an untenable position, you have to be actively ignorant. One motto on the show is, 'Keep your facts, I'm going with the truth.'"
-Stephen Colbert
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"I just think Rosa Parks was overrated. Last time I checked, she got famous for breaking the law.“
-Stephen Colbert
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"I used to write things for friends. There was this girl I had a crush on, and she had a teacher she didn't like at school. I had a real crush on her, so almost every day I would write her a little short story where she would kill him in a different way."
-Stephen Colbert
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"I wrote things for the school's newspaper, and - like all teenagers - I dabbled in poetry."
-Stephen Colbert
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"No, my mom kind of led me toward acting. She wanted to be an actress when she was younger. That made me interested in it when I was a kid, because she and I are very close."
-Stephen Colbert
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"I used to make up stuff in my bio all the time, that I used to be a professional ice-skater and stuff like that. I found it so inspirational. Why not make myself cooler than I am?"
-Stephen Colbert
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"How sweet it is!"
-Jackie Gleason
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"At the time when this famous historical battle was fought in Kosovo, the people were looking at the stars, expecting aid from them. Now, six centuries later, they are looking at the stars again, waiting to conquer them."
-Slobodan Milosevic
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"They can gas me, but I am famous. I have achieved in one day what it took Robert Kennedy all his life to do."
-Sirhan Sirhan
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"I don't see myself as famous at all so I'm continuing my life as normal."
-Ashley Madekwe
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"People should recognize who you are and how you can act rather then how famous you are."
-Mae Whitman
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"Practically everyone in Hollywood has a neighbor who's been famous, wants to be famous, is famous, has been married to someone famous, worked with someone famous, slept with someone famous, been blackmailed by someone famous."
-Jennifer Grey
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"I think the thing to remember, though, the next time you hear someone who is really certain that he is on the side of the angels, is that the idea of angels was created by human beings, who are famous for being frequently untrustworthy and occasional."
-Jon Carroll
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