"The trouble with women umpires is that I couldn't argue with one. I'd put my arms around her and give her a little kiss."
-Casey Stengel
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"Most ball games are lost, not won."
-Casey Stengel
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"They say Yogi Berra is funny. Well, he has a lovely wife and family, a beautiful home, money in the bank, and he plays golf with millionaires. What's funny about that?"
-Casey Stengel
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"You have to go broke three times to learn how to make a living."
-Casey Stengel
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"The key to being a good manager is keeping the people who hate me away from those who are still undecided."
-Casey Stengel
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"Ability is the art of getting credit for all the home runs somebody else hits."
-Casey Stengel
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"The last person they expected to connect with a screenplay was the comedic, blonde actress with the funny voice."
-Joey Lauren Adams
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"But I think funny and talent will always win out I mean, of course there are hurdles, but I think if you're funny you will get over all of that."
-Wanda Sykes
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"It is funny because the guy who is my boss now, Howard Stern, has a similarity there. He got big being a regular guy. He wasn't the greatest looking guy in the world."
-Artie Lange
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"I have a funny family, but none of them are remotely in show business."
-Wanda Sykes
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"When we criticize in Iran the actions of the government, the fundamentalists say that we and the Bush Administration are in the same camp. The funny thing is that human rights activists and Mr. Bush can never be situated in the same group."
-Shirin Ebadi
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"So it was just funny to read a script that was just similar to what had been going on in my life."
-Piper Perabo
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