"A lovely thing about Christmas is that it's compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together."
-Garrison Keillor
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"God writes a lot of comedy... the trouble is, he's stuck with so many bad actors who don't know how to play funny.“
-Garrison Keillor
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"Welcome to Lake Wobegon, where all the women are strong, all the men are good-looking, and all the children are above average."
-Garrison Keillor
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"Thank you, dear God, for this good life and forgive us if we do not love it enough. Thank you for the rain. And for the chance to wake up in three hours and go fishing: I thank you for that now, because I won't feel so thankful then."
-Garrison Keillor
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"They say such nice things about people at their funerals that it makes me sad that I'm going to miss mine by just a few days."
-Garrison Keillor
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"Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a function."
-Garrison Keillor
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"Nothing you do for children is ever wasted. They seem not to notice us, hovering, averting our eyes, and they seldom offer thanks, but what we do for them is never wasted."
-Garrison Keillor
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"The last person they expected to connect with a screenplay was the comedic, blonde actress with the funny voice."
-Joey Lauren Adams
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"But I think funny and talent will always win out I mean, of course there are hurdles, but I think if you're funny you will get over all of that."
-Wanda Sykes
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"It is funny because the guy who is my boss now, Howard Stern, has a similarity there. He got big being a regular guy. He wasn't the greatest looking guy in the world."
-Artie Lange
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"I have a funny family, but none of them are remotely in show business."
-Wanda Sykes
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"When we criticize in Iran the actions of the government, the fundamentalists say that we and the Bush Administration are in the same camp. The funny thing is that human rights activists and Mr. Bush can never be situated in the same group."
-Shirin Ebadi
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"So it was just funny to read a script that was just similar to what had been going on in my life."
-Piper Perabo
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