"Being a woman is of special interest only to aspiring male transsexuals. To actual women, it is simply a good excuse not to play football."
-Fran Lebowitz
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"As a teenager you are at the last stage in your life when you will be happy to hear that the phone is for you."
-Fran Lebowitz
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"Success didn't spoil me, I've always been insufferable."
-Fran Lebowitz
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"Romantic love is mental illness. But it's a pleasurable one. It's a drug. It distorts reality, and that's the point of it. It would be impossible to fall in love with someone that you really saw."
-Fran Lebowitz
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"If you are a dog and your owner suggests that you wear a sweater suggest that he wear a tail."
-Fran Lebowitz
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"There is no such thing as inner peace. There is only nervousness or death. Any attempt to prove otherwise constitutes unacceptable behavior."
-Fran Lebowitz
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"There's no regret. You can't regret. I mean, I've felt regret but I've also refused to allow regret to sow a seed and live in me because I don't believe it. You feel it, it's like guilt, it's like jealousy, it's like all those horrible things. You've just got to snip them and get them out, because they're no good."
-Jude Law
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"God is everywhere but He is most manifest in man. So serve man as God. That is as good as worshipping God."
-Ramakrishna
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"My mother gave lots of good advice and had a lot to say. As you get older, you realize everything she said was true."
-Lenny Kravitz
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"Bear and endure: This sorrow will one day prove to be for your good."
-Ovid
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"Let's not be afraid to speak the common sense truth: you can't have high standards without good discipline."
-William Hague
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"It's a good thing that beauty is only skin deep, or I'd be rotten to the core."
-Phyllis Diller
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