"I would probably be a teacher if I weren't a comedian."
-Brad Garrett
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"You take away all the other luxuries in life, and if you can make someone smile and laugh, you have given the most special gift: happiness."
-Brad Garrett
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"I believe it's a real tedious hostage negotiation to have a marriage be what it is."
-Brad Garrett
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"You take away all the other luxuries in life, and if you can make someone smile and laugh, you have given the most special gift: happiness."
-Brad Garrett
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"How sweet it is!"
-Jackie Gleason
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"We don't believe in rheumatism and true love until after the first attack."
-Marie von Ebner-Eschenbach
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"Humor results when society says you can't scratch certain things in public, but they itch in public."
-Tom Walsh
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"The best scary movies have great humor in them and a great story."
-Stephen Sommers
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"This is a feminist bookstore. There is no humor section."
-John Callahan
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"Humor has historically been tied to the mores of the day. The Yellow Kid was predicated on what people thought was funny about the immigrant Irish. When you're different in a society, you're funny."
-Will Eisner
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"We take the shortest route to the puck and arrive in ill humor."
-Bobby Clarke
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"You may not like the humor, but that is why every radio has an on-off button."
-Mel Karmazin
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