"Women should be obscene and not heard."
-Groucho Marx
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"One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got into my pajamas I'll never know.“
-Groucho Marx
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"Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot."
-Groucho Marx
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"Man does not control his own fate. The women in his life do that for him."
-Groucho Marx
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"In Hollywood, brides keep the bouquets and throw away the groom."
-Groucho Marx
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"I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury."
-Groucho Marx
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"No man goes before his time - unless the boss leaves early."
-Groucho Marx
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"I knew, however, that the next morning after the fight I would have to get away, and I did just in time, for a full company came early to look for me and were furious because I had escaped them."
-Jesse James
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"In the morning he was lying dead on one of the beds fully clothed. He was dead. I got the impression he wanted to go, and I must have killed him. I can't remember strangling him. I just sat there shocked."
-Dennis Nilsen
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"Tis always morning somewhere in the world."
-Richard Henry Horne
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"Secretary of State Colin Powell, thank you so much, as always, for joining us this morning."
-Hannah Storm
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"I have been wounded like this since about half past eight this morning and I will tell you how it happened."
-Francesco Borromini
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"It takes more than driving to become an IndyCar driver. Gone are the days when drivers show up Friday morning and go home Sunday night. We're all integral to our partnerships, commercially, motorsports. We're as much champions in the boardroom as we are on the racetrack."
-Charlie Kimball
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