"You can't make up anything anymore. The world itself is a satire. All you're doing is recording it."
-Art Buchwald
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"Whether it's the best of times or the worst of times, it's the only time we've got.“
-Art Buchwald
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"This is a wonderful way to celebrate an 80th birthday... I wanted to be 65 again, but they wouldn't let me - Homeland Security."
-Art Buchwald
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"How sweet it is!"
-Jackie Gleason
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"We don't believe in rheumatism and true love until after the first attack."
-Marie von Ebner-Eschenbach
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"It's better to have loved and lost than to have to do forty pounds of laundry a week."
-Laurence J. Peter
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"I'm into all that sappy stuff - a surprise picnic, nice dinner, or traveling. I'm kind of an old romantic."
-Will Estes
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"Democracy functions best when we have an active citizenry."
-Rick Perry
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"I've found the best way is to not be scared of the attention but to be grateful for it and open to it. It makes my days better rather than being annoyed that people want my attention."
-Brandon Routh
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"What I love best in life is new starts."
-Karl Lagerfeld
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"Recruitment and retention are critical to sustain our Armed Forces with the best men and women willing to stand in the gap and make huge sacrifices to ensure our freedom."
-Zack Wamp
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"One of the best things for a woman to hear is that she is sexy."
-Scarlett Johansson
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"I'm either going to go completely mental, completely bankrupt, or have the best success of my life."
-Katy Perry
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