"I don't think my wife likes me very much, when I had a heart attack she wrote for an ambulance."
-Frank Carson
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"Have you heard about the Irishman who reversed into a car boot sale and sold the engine?“
-Frank Carson
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"It's never occurred to me to worry about my health, or that I'll get old, or that people will stop laughing at me."
-Frank Carson
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"I am accusing him of stealing my best material, he was a very funny man."
-Frank Carson
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"How sweet it is!"
-Jackie Gleason
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"We don't believe in rheumatism and true love until after the first attack."
-Marie von Ebner-Eschenbach
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"It's better to have loved and lost than to have to do forty pounds of laundry a week."
-Laurence J. Peter
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Same Category
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"I wanted to end my life so bad and was in my car ready to go down that ramp into the water, and I did go part way, but I stopped. I went again and stopped. I then got out of the car and stood by the car a nervous wreck."
-Susan Smith
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"If you don't drink, smoke, or drive a car, you're a tax evader."
-Thomas S. Foley
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"He's computerized, but I won't let him come on cold. I created KITT. I understand the personality of the car."
-William Daniels
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"I am an artist. The track is my canvas, and the car is my brush."
-Graham Hill
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"The car business is a lot like football. In football, you have to win once a week. In the car business, you have to win every day."
-Tom Dempsey
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"Since my induction into the Sports Hall of Fame, I have wanted to have my No. 3 Chevy on exhibit for sports fans to see. I hope others will enjoy the car as much as I have."
-Junior Johnson
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