"Stand-up is like a movie every night. You write it, direct it, produce it, the audience votes, and you go home. There's nothing more satisfying.“

-Elayne Boosler

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Elayne Boosler quote about home: "Stand-up is like a movie every night. You write it, direct it, produce it, the audience votes, and y..."

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"When women are depressed, they eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. It's a whole different way of thinking."

-Elayne Boosler

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"I've thought for the last decade or so, the only actual place raw truth was seeping through in newspapers was on the Comics Pages. They were able to pull off intelligent social comment, pure truths not found elsewhere in the news pages, and had the ability to make it all funny, entertaining, and pertinent."

-Elayne Boosler

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"I am thankful I was born in America, although if I gain any more weight the burqa thing may start to seem like a good idea to me. See? Another plus about America, you can always find some food."

-Elayne Boosler

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"I am thankful that geniuses and artists and good people, no matter how hard it is, will eventually be recognized. I am doubly thankful that also goes for idiots."

-Elayne Boosler

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"I am thankful the most important key in history was invented. It's not the key to your house, your car, your boat, your safety deposit box, your bike lock or your private community. It's the key to order, sanity, and peace of mind. The key is 'Delete.'"

-Elayne Boosler

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"I am thankful the most important key in history was invented. It's not the key to your house, your car, your boat, your safety deposit box, your bike lock or your private community. It's the key to order, sanity, and peace of mind. The key is 'Delete.'"

-Elayne Boosler

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"Imagine if you had baseball cards that showed all the performance stats for your people: batting averages, home runs, errors, ERAs, win/loss records. You could see what they did well and poorly and call on the right people to play the right positions in a very transparent way."

-Ray Dalio

"I think it's easiest to teach by example. My dad didn't tell us to work hard we just saw how hard he worked. I know I have shortcomings - like a short fuse - but I've learned you can't come home from a long day of work and snap at the kids."

-Chris O'Donnell

"My father was always depressed. When he was home and sober, he was mostly in his room."

-Sherman Alexie

"To the former child migrants, who came to Australia from a home far away, led to believe this land would be a new beginning, when only to find it was not a beginning, but an end, an end of innocence - we apologise and we are sorry. To the mothers who lost the maternal right to love and care for their child - we apologise, and we are sorry."

-Malcolm Turnbull

"At home I've got a very puerile, juvenile sense of humour."

-Thom Yorke

"We talk a lot in our home together about where we're going, what I'm doing."

-Melinda Gates