"I told my wife the truth. I told her I was seeing a psychiatrist. Then she told me the truth: that she was seeing a psychiatrist, two plumbers, and a bartender."
-Rodney Dangerfield
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"It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass.“
-Rodney Dangerfield
posted in marriage
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"Acting deals with very delicate emotions. It is not putting up a mask. Each time an actor acts he does not hide he exposes himself."
-Rodney Dangerfield
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"I remember the time I was kidnapped and they sent a piece of my finger to my father. He said he wanted more proof."
-Rodney Dangerfield
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"I drink too much. The last time I gave a urine sample it had an olive in it."
-Rodney Dangerfield
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"I went to a fight the other night, and a hockey game broke out."
-Rodney Dangerfield
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"With my wife I don't get no respect. I made a toast on her birthday to 'the best woman a man ever had.' The waiter joined me."
-Rodney Dangerfield
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Same Category
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"My wife disagrees with 100 percent of what I say. That's the same marriage I have."
-Curtis Sliwa
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"Other than marriage, she doesn't control me and I don't control her."
-Gavyn Davies
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"Marriage is one of the most sacred human institutions. I asked our Senators, as many South Dakotans have done, to protect marriage as a union between a man and a woman."
-Mike Rounds
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"I am a firm believer in marriage. In the future I will be married."
-Elisabetta Canalis
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"I've learned this is a very long marriage doing a television show. I like the people that I work with to be people I enjoy, so you want to cast people who are as excited and enthusiastic as you are."
-Shonda Rhimes
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"Marriage: love, honor, and negotiate."
-Joe Moore
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