"The first time I see a jogger smiling, I'll consider it.“

-Joan Rivers

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Joan Rivers quote about time: "The first time I see a jogger smiling, I'll consider it."

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"I'm Jewish. I don't work out. If God had wanted us to bend over, He would have put diamonds on the floor."

-Joan Rivers

"What are people going to do? Fire me? I've been fired before. Not book me? I've been out of work before. I don't care."

-Joan Rivers

"Don't follow any advice, no matter how good, until you feel as deeply in your spirit as you think in your mind that the counsel is wise."

-Joan Rivers

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"She doesn't understand the concept of Roman numerals. She thought we just fought in world war eleven."

-Joan Rivers

"Thank God we're living in a country where the sky's the limit, the stores are open late and you can shop in bed thanks to television."

-Joan Rivers

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"Don't tell your kids you had an easy birth or they won't respect you. For years I used to wake up my daughter and say, 'Melissa you ripped me to shreds. Now go back to sleep.'."

-Joan Rivers

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Same Category

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"To be a Negro in this country and to be relatively conscious is to be in a rage almost all the time."

-James A. Baldwin

"No country can act wisely simultaneously in every part of the globe at every moment of time."

-Henry A. Kissinger

"It's time to get real, folks. Hope and change ain't working. Hope and change is not a solution. Hope and change is not a job."

-Herman Cain

"It's plain hokum. If you can't convince 'em, confuse 'em. It's an old political trick. But this time it won't work."

-Harry S. Truman

"Nixon is one of the few in the history of this country to run for high office talking out of both sides of his mouth at the same time and lying out of both sides."

-Harry S. Truman

"A lot of people would be embarrassed to admit that they were on 'Barney', but I embrace the fact. I just had such a wonderful time doing that show. I learned what a camera and prop is, and all that. I learned my manners too, so I guess that's a good thing!"

-Selena Gomez