"What's so touching is the way we fight the war right until the moment our business is taken care of and then we turn on a dime and we immediately start taking care of people. It's like a shock and aw shucks campaign."
-Dennis Miller
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"Born again?! No, I'm not. Excuse me for getting it right the first time.“
-Dennis Miller
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"I'm a comedian, for God's sake. Viewers shouldn't trust me. And you know what? They're hip enough to know they shouldn't trust me. I'm just doing stand-up comedy."
-Dennis Miller
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"I had fun pretending to be a sportscaster. People always think that was a down thing for me. I had the best job in sports broadcasting for two years."
-Dennis Miller
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"I didn't know my Dad - he moved out early. And my mom's politics were kind of hardscrabble. She didn't think about Democrats or Republicans. She thought about who made sense. I've been both in my life."
-Dennis Miller
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"Parenting is the most important job on the planet next to keeping Gary Busey off the nation's highways."
-Dennis Miller
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"Just put down 9/11... I think, on most things I'm liberal, except on defending ourselves and keeping half the money. Those things I'm kind of conservative on."
-Dennis Miller
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Same Category
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"To be a Negro in this country and to be relatively conscious is to be in a rage almost all the time."
-James A. Baldwin
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"No country can act wisely simultaneously in every part of the globe at every moment of time."
-Henry A. Kissinger
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"It's time to get real, folks. Hope and change ain't working. Hope and change is not a solution. Hope and change is not a job."
-Herman Cain
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"It's plain hokum. If you can't convince 'em, confuse 'em. It's an old political trick. But this time it won't work."
-Harry S. Truman
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"Nixon is one of the few in the history of this country to run for high office talking out of both sides of his mouth at the same time and lying out of both sides."
-Harry S. Truman
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"A lot of people would be embarrassed to admit that they were on 'Barney', but I embrace the fact. I just had such a wonderful time doing that show. I learned what a camera and prop is, and all that. I learned my manners too, so I guess that's a good thing!"
-Selena Gomez
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