"Some women hold up dresses that are so ugly and they always say the same thing: 'This looks much better on.' On what? On fire?"
-Rita Rudner
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"Men are self-confident because they grow up identifying with super-heroes. Women have bad self-images because they grow up identifying with Barbie.“
-Rita Rudner
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"Men reach their sexual peak at eighteen. Women reach theirs at thirty-five. Do you get the feeling that God is playing a practical joke?"
-Rita Rudner
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"Men who consistently leave the toilet seat up secretly want women to get up to go the bathroom in the middle of the night and fall in."
-Rita Rudner
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"A man will go to war, fight and die for his country. But he won't get a bikini wax."
-Rita Rudner
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"In Hollywood a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk."
-Rita Rudner
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"Someday I want to be rich. Some people get so rich they lose all respect for humanity. That's how rich I want to be."
-Rita Rudner
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"I don't think balance is something you get from someone else it's something women have to find from within. For me, finding balance is still a work in progress."
-Rachel Weisz
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"From sixteen to twenty, all women, kept in humor by their hopes and by their attractions, appear to be good-natured."
-Samuel Richardson
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"I love women more than anything."
-Vin Diesel
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"When they take surveys of women in business, of the Fortune 500, the successful women, 80% of them, say they were in sports as a young woman."
-Billie Jean King
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"The Cause of Women is generally the Cause of Virtue."
-Samuel Richardson
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"Women are always most observed when they seem themselves least to observe, or to lay out for observation."
-Samuel Richardson
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