"I told my wife the truth. I told her I was seeing a psychiatrist. Then she told me the truth: that she was seeing a psychiatrist, two plumbers, and a bartender."
-Rodney Dangerfield
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"With my wife I don't get no respect. I made a toast on her birthday to 'the best woman a man ever had.' The waiter joined me.“
-Rodney Dangerfield
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"Acting deals with very delicate emotions. It is not putting up a mask. Each time an actor acts he does not hide he exposes himself."
-Rodney Dangerfield
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"I remember the time I was kidnapped and they sent a piece of my finger to my father. He said he wanted more proof."
-Rodney Dangerfield
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"I drink too much. The last time I gave a urine sample it had an olive in it."
-Rodney Dangerfield
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"I went to a fight the other night, and a hockey game broke out."
-Rodney Dangerfield
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"With my wife I don't get no respect. I made a toast on her birthday to 'the best woman a man ever had.' The waiter joined me."
-Rodney Dangerfield
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"Democracy functions best when we have an active citizenry."
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"I've found the best way is to not be scared of the attention but to be grateful for it and open to it. It makes my days better rather than being annoyed that people want my attention."
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"What I love best in life is new starts."
-Karl Lagerfeld
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"Recruitment and retention are critical to sustain our Armed Forces with the best men and women willing to stand in the gap and make huge sacrifices to ensure our freedom."
-Zack Wamp
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"One of the best things for a woman to hear is that she is sexy."
-Scarlett Johansson
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"I'm either going to go completely mental, completely bankrupt, or have the best success of my life."
-Katy Perry
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