"My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor."
-Phyllis Diller
migrate2View Quote
Other Quotes
Discover more inspiring quotes from our collection
"What I don't like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day."
-Phyllis Diller
christmasView Quote
"Tranquilizers work only if you follow the advice on the bottle - keep away from children."
-Phyllis Diller
workView Quote
"The reason women don't play football is because 11 of them would never wear the same outfit in public."
-Phyllis Diller
womenView Quote
"Our dog died from licking our wedding picture."
-Phyllis Diller
weddingView Quote
"Any time three New Yorkers get into a cab without an argument, a bank has just been robbed."
-Phyllis Diller
timeView Quote
Same Category
More quotes in this category
"I love each and every one of you but, like my own family, you thrill, you frustrate, you anger."
-John Buchanan
angerView Quote
"Anger becomes limiting, restricting. You can't see through it. While anger is there, look at that, too. But after a while, you have to look at something else."
-Thylias Moss
angerView Quote
"As a system of philosophy it is not like the Tower of Babel, so daring its high aim as to seek a shelter against God's anger but it is like a pyramid poised on its apex."
-Adam Sedgwick
angerView Quote
"Anger is seldom without argument but seldom with a good one."
-Lord Halifax
angerView Quote
"I don't have the feeling of being motivated by anger, revenge or frustration."
-Agnes Obel
angerView Quote
"In the heat of our campaigns, we have all become accustomed to a little anger and exaggeration. Yet, on the whole, our political process has served us well."
-Edmund S. Muskie
angerView Quote